As we grow into our true selves, we begin to encounter situations that may be considered complicated. Relationships are dynamic. Because of this, there is no guarantee that we will live through all of them unscathed. One of the most important skills to learn in life is discernment. Discernment to know when you are making the right decisions in life. More specifically, when to stand in your strength, and not apologize. We like to endorse willingness to learn from others. As well as being open to the perspectives and experiences of others. However, if you come from a place of constant openness, it may leave you vulnerable to dangerous energy. People who see your light, and make it their mission to capitalize off of your energy to your detriment.
Don’t apologize for taking control of your life.
Life comes with ups and downs. At the end of 2019, I found myself in a place of sameness. Everything was lock stepping to the beat of some other entity. I felt excluded from my own desires and life goals. Because of this, I picked up and moved across the country to take my story back. Since leaving, I’ve been able to create a new community and increase my income by 25%. This was just something that wasn’t in reach back home. This past year is just something that I refuse to apologize for.
though people may not agree with your choices, you should focus on your own needs. what are the pros and cons of your decision? If the cons are just other people’s opinions, then it’s time to act for yourself. The people who are serious about you, and love you will understand your choice. Those who aren’t supportive of you may be coming from a place of self benefit.
For saying no.
When life gets tough, its very easy to unknowingly overcommit. Especially if you are a people pleaser. Certain things can become tough in relationships like:
- Setting financial boundaries
- choosing who you surround yourself with
- Staying motivated
When things become difficult to navigate, the way that I regain control is by saying no. No allows you to take time for yourself. It allows you to regain stable footing emotionally, financially, and mentally. The problem with saying no is that it’s not what people want to hear. Standing up for yourself becomes uncomfortable when you start resisting the wants of external forces. However, it is not something that you should apologize for. Just keep in mind that everyone else puts themselves before all else. There is absolutely nothing wrong with doing the same for yourself.
Don’t apologize for needing space.
Needing space is a human response to unpleasant stimuli. This can come as a shock to many, which is why it causes discomfort in certain relationships. However, people who love you will understand that needing space has more to do with you than them. Solitude gives you time to digest your reality in the safety of your own space. It allows you to process life at a rate that makes you comfortable, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
the reason you shouldn’t apologize for needing space is because a lack of solitude actually is not healthy. According to forbes.com, having space promotes things like creativity, mental strength, and empathy. Who in your life wouldn’t want you to exhibit those behaviors?
All of the topics in this article have a common theme. They benefit your mental health and personal development. So how weird is it, that doing these three things often make us feel guilty? We often apologize, or make up for the fact that we practice self care in these ways. the point of this post is to bring awareness to the fact that we shouldn’t apologize for doing things that benefit our well-being. now it’s your turn. How do you practice self care? And do you often feel guilty when you choose yourself over others?
This Post Has 17 Comments
Very well written
Thank you so much for reading!
Agree, don’t apologize for your rights…it’s your right, not a privilege…
So true! No is a complete sentence.
I whole heartedly agree, not apologising for having healthy boundaries is such a powerful tool for good mental health. Thank you for talking about this.
Important to remember as it seems like the world is getting more sensitive. You don’t need to put someone else’s expectations ahead of your needs, and you don’t need to apologize for that! ❤️
Great read! I especially love the “needing space” one. I am a chronic people pleaser and I totally feel bad for needing a minute but this is a great reminder not to.
Lovely article! Such great reminders. I especially love “taking control of your life” because that can be translated to diet, exercise, resigning from a toxic job, etc. Thank you for sharing!
So important for our mental health. Thank you for sharing!
no problem at all!
Love this ! Thank you for the reminder!
you are most welcome!
you are very welcome!
I struggle with saying no!! I need to be better at this but I definitely need more time for myself. Thanks for the reminder!
It is a true struggle! very uncomfortable. thanks for reading!
Excellent blog you have got here.. It’s difficult to find quality writing like yours nowadays.
I really appreciate people like you! Take care!!
Thanks so much Denisha!